More irritation for my Jenn:

I found that on GameFAQs they have quite a robust selection of Grand Theft Auto 3 game guides. The cool thing is, there’s a great set of maps showing you where all the hidden packages are. (If you haven’t played the game, that may not make sense - there are all these little packages hidden around the city and if you pick up enough of them you get more weapons and stuff.)

I have a decent map to them in a recent issue of PlayStation Magazine (yes, I’m a subscriber - you should be, too), but while the general locations are shown, a description isn’t present. Trust me - you need a description. If you’re wandering around and can’t find the package, it’s probably because you have to jump your car off some ramp and land on the roof of a building, then get out and run across a couple of other rooftops and drop down into some totally inaccessible place in order to get it.

Anyway, I’ve got like 27 of the 33 packages on the first island but before I move on to the second island, I wanna get all the packages. This will make it so much easier.

Oh, and I’ll be at the Portland Trailblazers game tonight against the Memphis Grizzlies. Whoever they are. Got box seats courtesy of the ol’ employer. Can’t complain about that, right? Hey, maybe I’ll get a free Chalupa out of the deal.

“…you don’t have to be cool to rule my world…”

If you’re looking for the song “Kiss” - check these albums out.

The Very Best of Prince	The Best of Tom Jones

I am a happy camper.

During lunch I went to Turn Around Sound, a local new and used CD store (that is, local to my place of employment) and found me a copy of The Best of Tom Jones. Which, of course, contains his cover of Prince’s song, Kiss. Oooooh, yeeeeeah.

I have issued a fair warning to all relevant individuals in my department (i.e., those adjoining my cubicle) that there is about to be some serious Tom Jones action going on here and that they should watch for flying panties lest they be pelted to death.

Tom is now crooning away. I am stoked. Of course, I’ll still have to venture forth this weekend to find the Reload album, but for now, I’m good to go.

This thought has crossed my mind several times, but really hit me yesterday while driving home from work: There are two kinds of people in the world - those who believe in the bumper sticker as a statement and those who think the bumper sticker people need to figure out their larger issues.

I’m one of the people who think that bumper sticker folks need to figure out their larger issues.

Maybe it’s different in other parts of the country (or the world, for that matter). I can only really use the Portland, Oregon locale as my frame of reference since I’ve never really spent too much time in other places. Stick with me here - I really don’t think I’m wrong on this one…

For example, if you own a Volkswagen bus (already you’ve dug a hole for yourself, but…), where is it written that you need to cover the entire back end of the bus with bumper stickers? And, yes, I’m counting the Grateful Dead sticker(s). No one is more tired of seeing those stupid bears than I am.

I also noticed that if you do choose the bumper sticker route, all the bumper sticker people in Oregon have made a pact that they all need to have a “Visualize Whirled Peas” sticker, like that’s the most original or funny statement ever.

This is actually what set me off and made me think to write about this

• I was driving behind this Volvo-driving hippie with his Grateful Dead sticker, his “Clearcutting Kills Salmon” sticker, and his obligatory “Visualize Whirled Peas” sticker, when I felt this overwhelming urge to pull him out of his car and wipe the stickers off his bumper with his forehead. It really makes me wonder - do these bumper sticker people really think that driving around with these statements on their barely-passing-DEQ-Volvo-automobiles is going to make people stop clearcutting or consuming natural resources (or anything else for that matter)?

Maybe I’m just jaded. I mean, the first time I saw a beggar with a sign saying “Why Lie? I Need A Beer,” I gave the guy a fiver. I thought it was clever, and if you can provide entertainment of some nature, sure, I’ll contribute. (Hey, I gotta get something for my money - there’s no free lunch out there.)

But now when I see these dozens - nay, hundreds - of people (some wearing nicer clothes than what I’ve got on at the time), all of which are carrying “Why Lie? I Need A Beer” signs… it just irritates me.

I think that’s what’s happened with the “Visualize Whirled Peas” thing. I think I can dredge up a memory of a time when I actually thought that was clever. It’s just not anymore. And there’s the rub.

You know, I’m not really sure where I’m going with this. Maybe I’m just frustrated at the lack of originality out there. Maybe I just think bumper sticker people are mindless sheep lacking any proper sense of humor. Maybe I’m just talking to hear the sound of my own voice. Who knows? I guess the long and the short of it is, if you want to make a statement, make the damn statement already and lose the stupid bumper stickers.

Oh, and all who wander are fucking lost, so get some direction and contribute to society already. You know who you are.

There’s something about a Starbucks Frappuccino that just gets me going. Nothing like a Venti* Mocha Frappuccino right before work. I got one this morning with my friend/coworker/boss Greg at the local Barnes & Noble. Really just hit the spot. More [probably] later…

* “Venti” is actually a trademarked word of Starbucks, which I really don’t understand because it’s Italian for “twenty.” How do you trademark a number? What’s that all about?

Jenn is gonna be so pissed…

I went to this Cheat Code Central site and found all these secrets and cheats for Grand Theft Auto 3. There’s a bunch of stuff I didn’t know about, like if you get a certain number of these hidden packages that are stuck around the city then you get more weapons that regenerate around your hideout. That’s cool, since right now I just get a baseball bat and a gun would be handy. There are also all of these hidden missions around the city…

Looks like I’ll be spending some quality PS2 time tonight. I hope. :)

Talked to my mom at the Fred Meyer main office and it looks like I may be SOL as far as the Tom Jones selection at Freddy’s. Guess I’ll have to hit Tower or something this weekend. Sigh. Not that I’m disappointed to go to Tower, but I was hoping to have my Tom fix sooner rather than later. Oh, well.

I ate some Red Vines this morning and it reminded me how good they are. I hadn’t had them for a while. Tasty! Something I don’t understand, though: black Red Vines. Shouldn’t Red Vines be, well, RED?

Maybe I’ll have to get some Red Vines this weekend. A tub of those things lasts forever, regardless of how much you eat. It’s like magic.

I’ve got this set of Rollerscape in my cube. It’s pretty sweet. I’m thinking I need more pieces, though, since the size of the marble raceways you can build with the starter set is a little limited. I need to be able to build something that’s, like, as tall as I am. It’d be much more impressive that way.